Hot Sauce

I like hot sauce…Probably more than the next person…But it depends on what it’s used on…Let’s take Lady Liplock for instance…
A fairly nice looking young lady that rents her talent for services…
Her name explains it all…
But my biggest concern is her eating habits…Other than dick…
She made an unusual request before pursuing her paid service…
PORK SKINS, HOT SAUCE and a sip of VODKA…
I honor the lady and got her TREATS. ..NowS it’s time for my treat…
The Lady shook some hot sauce on her pork skins…Sipped a shot of vodka…And BURNT my dick head…
That bitch put me out of HOE HOPPIN commission for a week…
All because she had to have vodka and HOT SAUCE

…Sly1

@Garfield’​s

It’s her birthday. It’s her birthday yeah it truly is…
we’re out snapping pictures drinking Virgin Mary’s I am anyway…she’s drinking the best as usual tonight. ..
We’re  having a marvelous dinner evening for her birthday …And we are halfway thru dinner laughing and enjoying each other like never before…
we done finish dinner & stimulating conversation. ..
Now we headed to a nice place in a booth for a drink & for some more we time. ..
Then take in the rest of the mood home for love…
That’s how it all started out @GARFIELDS

…Sly1

Get some MILK

I’m @ this bitch dorm all Women University after partying all-night. ..
Woke up hungry and needed something quick so I can get the fuck out without getting caught…It’s still early 5:30am…
So I still have a little darkness to maneuver around…
She have a roommate that eats all-night & day a fucking human garbage disposer…
So I politely asked her do she have milk for a bowl of cereal…
She the roommate says” I dranked it up with da donuts “…
now she knocking on the doors of other students waking them up asking who the fuck got MILK.

…Sly1

B.Y.O Wedding

I thought that was an ORIGINAL Ideal…
really like Martin says” everybody can eat what they want “.
So I’m thinking a PICNIC WEDDING outside @ the neighborhood park.
& a few barbeque pits…and coolers of beer, pops & wine…
PARK GAZEBO Reserve for the DJ & photographer…Trash cans scatter every 30 feet to keep the grounds clean…
And a Few of the homies for security…
Everybody invited, It’s a public park…
The perfect ideal B.Y.O Wedding.

…Sly1

Let’s Love Again

Hey now suga pie honey bun…
Let’s come out the gate  and strong…If you call it that…
We all as couples get caught up @ times…And forget the corny stuff…
Let’s walk and hold hands…Leave the car parked at home…
Let’s sit in the park on a swing and kiss…Before we see who can swing the highest…
Let’s slow dance and hug tight when we get home…
Let’s get two forks and one slice of pie…Share it quietly and stare @ each other…
Let’s cuddle on the love seat & watch some TV…Then read a book together…
Let’s have sex and make love…Cuddle after and talk about our love…
Let’s just love each other again…For life this time.

…Sly1

 

You Just Don’t Know

I was laughing @ my father…We were on a whole family outting for dinner…#True…
My brother was treating us all that day…Shit was funny because my father was old school…I mean older too…
Whether it was dressing, music, tv shows, westerns & plain foods…With the exception of wild game hunting…
Because he was a country boy…
Anyway…My brother is ordering and making suggestions of good cuisine…And my father requested shrimps…
So my brother says out loud “Could you please bring an order of PRAWNS”…My country ass father says “I told you I want shrimp…I don’t want no prawns”…
Shit was too funny…
& this morning my girl was telling me a funny story about something she heard…Someone said “I don’t want no SUSHI”…They said they wanted FISH…
I laugh so damn hard…That’s worse than me…
I thought CUISINE was a delicatessen dish…LMAO…When you don’t know…You just don’t know…
Next time you better ask somebody…
Looking stupid doesn’t always look good.

…Sly1

First Light

The first thing I do in the morning when I’m up…Is forget to pray and give thanks…
Then I roam around the house collecting my thoughts…Then I do the hygiene stuff…After that…
I’m pulling out leftovers from last night’s dinner for breakfast…
Then if I remember to bless my food and continue with prayer…So I can start out the rest of the day…
Advancing towards a day of prosperity…
But most times when I depart from someone…I tell them @ times to have a blessed day…
It’s at that time…I remember to pray and give thanks…
Amen!

…Sly1

Stir Stick Poison

I was poisoned from a stir stick…According to the posing victims unit….
The police came to the hospital…After I was conscious again…
They have to get a police report anytime someone was shot or attempted murder victims…
So I explained to the officers exactly what happen…
The woman bartender used to be a woman I dated for years…We had a bitter breakup…But I thought all that was behind us…
But evidently I was totally wrong…
Because I’m here in the hospital getting my stomach pumped…
All because she laced a stir stick with poison…To stir my pina colada.. LMAO

…Sly1

“Come & Get It”

“Come & get it” she says…My girl has finally lifted the injunctions and stipulations on the package…
I’m now allowed on her premises to get some cookies & cream…I’ve been waiting…Thought I was done.
I was almost tempted to turn Buddhist…Kiddin…Not really…
I know nothing of Asian  spiritual teachings and ways of life BUDDAH…
So I’ll shut my mouth on that…But damn…
I’m so glad to be back dipping in the cookie jar…Don’t hate.
Its what’s wanted.
Let us all be happy for everybody around the world who has a cookie jar…
LMAO.

…Sly1

 

Chef * Sly1

Damn right…I’ve eaten @ many foreign and domestic cuisines…
& I have culinary skills…So you betta ask somebody…
But first I’d like to tell you about when I tried to take a ghetto ass muhfucka to dine…
We went to a French restaurante’…
She ordered SHIT that wasn’t on the fuckin menu…Bitch asked “Umm…Do’s yall have ah French fries with ranch & BBQ pork chops and ah sock it to me cake?”…
This bitch made me choke on the serious look she had on her face…
I kindly asked security if would he please grant me a wish…”Please remove your revolver from your holster…And FUCKIN SHOOT ME…& CALL THIS BITCH A CAB”…
I cannot continue this post…
Maybe some other time…In my next life…

…Sly1